December 2009
12 posts
“..and all his jokes started with, ‘..and Dustin Hoffman come up...”
In't Christmas Fuckin' Nice? (Yes)
Yes it is, I can now report from two countries, the UK & NL. Amsterdam was born for Christmas what with all its warm ‘n’ festive cubby holes and bauble covered prostitutes. I strolled through Vondel Park yesterday to see children, adults and the ones inbetween all building snowmen and having snowfights and falling off their bikes in the most graceful way possible (which...
Smashy Smashy Exploding Bicycle
I think that’s probably the best headline I’m ever likely to write, I could just leave it there and you’d be satisfied but nah, cock it, I’ll divulge.
Yes, so my bicylce exploded whilst I was riding it at pace and yes I’m as confused as you are, I mean how does cog driven engine-less bicycle explode? I don’t have the answers but I do have a smashed up...
The One Thing I Yearn To See but Inevitably Never...
More than anything in the world, I want to see the world. There’s a deep wholesome part of my being that wants or needs to see the earth, the planet as a sphere hoveringly hung with fragility in the middle of black. Fuck.
There’s something about actually seeing it but rather ‘knowing’ it, I think that the few that have experienced it now harness something so profound and...
I'd Like To Say It's All Muscle.
Why are the tops of my trousers getting tighter? My thighs feel like a blue whale trapped in a sock, were my trousers (all of them) so thigh huggy before? I keep thinking it’s that they’re just too high but if I ride them any lower people with be staring into the abyss.
Ah hold on a second, aaah I know, it’s becasue I’ve been riding a bicycle everyday for the past few...
Balloons for Me? You Should Have.
Came outside of my current place of residence to find some lovely balloons, look at that, lovely eh? ‘How delightful’ I thought, someone’s finally taken the initiative to physically show me my worth in pink and white balloon form, thank you mystery balloon baptist! I appreciate you too!
Then the left side of my brain took president and reminded me of the baby that was born in...
“There once was a boy from St.Annes,
who decided to make bigger plans,
from...”
– my brain
“If you had to change your name to the name of a tool, what would it be?”
– my brain
“How much are the chips?”
“€1.50, you want mayonnaise?”...”
– FEBO
Planetarium, Aquarium, Zoo. All in Amsterdam, all...
Amsterdam throws up an abstract treat every now and then, this was in the shape of a Planetarium, Aquarium, Zoo, Synagogue & Green House rolled into one (night). Was in the Zoo at 1am. funfun.
What really caught my eye and brain was the planetarium, ooh those swirls and late 90’s graphics made me feel quivery lipped with nostalgia and newfangled awe simultaneously. At one point in an...